Sharing Doritos
by ForeverLilacLies
Summary: Jason finally worked up the nerve to ask Dick out. He has to contend with a enabling Roy, a plotting Tim and he really should learn to consider his surroundings.


He really didn't have a strategy for something like this. Sort of just planned to dive in and hope for the best. Asking Dick Grayson out officially seemed like a difficult task. Sure they'd been fucking for months now, but neither had really labeled it. It started off as stress relief and recently ended with Dick spending the night and them waking up together and smiling sleepily in the morning light. It just felt right to take it a step further, even if it was grossly out of character for him. So maybe Jason Todd was pretty famous for jumping the gun a bit. He had had a crush on Dick since he was a kid, and now he was a _man_. A big man, with big arms and skull crushing thighs. While he was all coiled muscle and crushing skulls, Dick was all slim muscle and mythical butt. That ass was a thing of legends. Many had tried to claim, but few had succeeded. Jason could still remember the mouth watering moment he had paid eyes on that naked ass. So plump, so perfect and like King Authur with Excalibur, he was going to tap that.

He had gotten a wonderful and moving pep talk from Roy Harper before he went to find Dick. Roy was a good friend, with a wisdom beyond his years. No other man could understand Jason quite like Roy could. All Jason had needed was a little push.

"You _ask_ him out." Roy shouted, pointing to the window and Jason was hyped up on nerves and excitement.

"Yeah...I will!" Jason declared, feeling confident.

"Yeah, Todd!" Roy shouted, smacking his fist into his palm.

" **Yeah**!" Jason repeated, even louder.

"You _tap_ that fine ass!" Roy encouraged.

"Yeah!"

So, Jason had decided to track Dick down. He needed to find his location and Barbara hadn't answered, so he reached out to Replacement instead. Desperate times called for desperate measures.

"Connor?" Tim's voice piped up, sounding hopefully as he answered the mystery call. Jason rolled his eyes. Like he needed to hear about Tim's bootycall with Superboy...

"Nope." He drawled out, walking briskly across a rooftop. What a gorgeous day.

"Oh, it's you." Tim sounded disappointed.

"Yeah, listen Replacement, I need Nightwing's location." Jason dropped down to a new building.

"Why? Is he in danger?" Tim's voice was laced with concern. Jason sighed, rolling his eyes.

"No. I need to see him."

"Why?"

"That's none of your business. Now where is he?"

"Are you finally going to admitted your deep unsatiated eternal love for him?" Tim asked as he spun around in the chair he was seated in.

"What? No! I-" Jason began.

"Jaaaasooooon," Tim sang out. "Don't lie."

"I'm not lying. I just wanna eat out his asshole." Jason replied and stopped when he realized he had just passed by an open window and an old woman was staring out at him. He expected her to look appalled, but she merely winked. Which was worse. Jason quickly made a beeline for the next building, waiting for Tim to stop sputtering in offense.

"That-why would you...I did not need that visual image." Tim muttered in horror. Dick was his brother. His wonderful, golden and pure brother. No need for that sort of image.

"It's actually really nice to look at," Jason replied casually. "You just gotta open him up nice and good and the stick your-"

"No. Nope. Never." Tim cut him off.

"Replacement...where is he?" Jason asked again and Tim sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose.

"You'll owe me." He finally relented.

"Yeah, how about no?" Jason replied as expected and Tim slowly sighed, leaning back in his chair, fingers clasped in front of him.

"That's a shame...I would hate to have to relay this information to Bruce...or Damian. You know how he is with Dick." He sighed out and Jason snorted.

"You don't scare me."

"What's that Damian?" Tim suddenly called out. "You want to know what Todd plans on doing to your beloved Grayson? I shouldn't tell. That would be so invasive..." Tim inspected his fingernails.

"Listen you little shit-" Jason growled, gripping the communicator and Tim leaned forward against the desk.

"Balls in my park Red. You really want to play this game?" He challenged.

"..."

"..."

"...You win...what do you want?" Jason finally spat out, eyes narrowed behind his mask. Tim smiled in pleasure, leaning back in the chair and putting his feet on the desk, legs crossed at the ankles.

"Excellent. Well, you see...Connor and I are currently-"

"I don't need to hear about you and Superboy smacking sausages." Jason cut him off.

"Wow, rude. Let me finish. I have not...slapped sausages with Connor as you so eloquently put...yet." Tim sighed.

"Ohhh," Jason whistled. "There's a **_yet_** involved."

"Exactly. Neither of us have the privacy to actually enjoy each other's company and with Bruce breathing down my neck, I have no real chance of getting away." Tim argued and Jason could see his point. With Dick declaring his independence and leaving the manor, it left Tim to lord over. He sat down on the edge of the building, feet dangling.

"Okay, so what do you need."

"A place to be able to meet up with Connor without distractions." Tim answered quickly and Jason sighed. So needy...

"Okay, yeah I've got a place where you and your boy toy can play missionary."

"Good." Tim replied primly. "I'm sending you the coordinates now." A moment later, Jason's communicator lit up. He grinned in glee.

"Excellent. Great doing business with you."

"Likewise." A beat of silence.

"I still hate you." Jason muttered.

"I still don't care." Tim chirped and turned his communication with Red Hood off.

* * *

Jason took the coordinates and puffed out his chest. Not that he really needed to. He was ripped. He was going to march right up to Goldie, lay a wet one on him and ask him out like a real gentleman. Then probably tap that ass. Roy would be so proud. He followed the coordinates, quickly stopping at the convenient store for cheap flowers. The coordinates led to a decrepit building in the west of the city. Jason silently prepped himself as he approached the building.

"I'm mother fucking Red Hood. I'm not scared of _shit_." He convinced himself. He strode up the stairs, listening as each step creaked. What the Hell was Dickie doing in a place like this? He found the door he was looking for and dramatically kicked it in, because dramatics ran in the Batfamily.

"Nightwing! Your ass is an all exclusive nightclub, and I want in!" He called out as the door fell to the ground with a dull thud. He stepped over the fallen door to see Nightwing who was staring at him in shock.

"Red-" He began.

"Hey Goldie. Listen, I know you're probably a bit busy right now, but hear me out. I'm in love with you. Like, not _The Notebook_ kind of shit, but the real gritty love story...like from _Up_. So, I think it's time we stop just fucking and going and start fucking and staying. I don't wanna be with anyone else and if the way you screamed when I shoved my tongue in your asshole is any indication, you like me too. So let's go steady...or something...if you want to..." He trailed off at this and Nightwing stared.

"Are you...asking me out?" Nightwing stared and Red Hood shrugged. He was holding the convenient store bought flowers in one hand and a gun in the other.

"Uh, yeah." He replied as if it were obvious.

"But right now?" Dick prompted and again, Red Hood shrugged.

"No time like the present." He pointed out. There was a long silence.

"Don't let me interrupt you." Slade Wilson stated from where he was sitting bound from his fight with Nightwing.

"Shut up Deathstroke." Red Hood muttered without looking away from Nightwing who frowned in disapproval.

"Red, don't be rude." He chided before turning to the bound man. "Slade, we are having a private conversation. Please wait."

"My apologies." Slade replied, still smirking. Jason wondered if he would be pissed if he shot out his other eye. Nightwing faced Jason again.

"You actually want to date me?" He sounded shocked and Jason groaned. How many times did he have to say it?

"Well, yeah."

"I thought you didn't do dating." Dick argued, hands on hips. Jason shrugged, he moved to sit on the coffee table by Deathtroke, shoving the man out of his way as he made himself comfortable. He took off his helmet and set it next to him. He could feel Dick's eyes on him. He looked at his hands clasped on his lap.

"I don't. Dating sucks. You have no privacy, holdings hands and affection is exhausting, and someone always ends up eating all the Doritos. but I want to with you." He looked back up at Dick who's lips were twitching, eyes widening behind his mask.

"Are you sure?" He finally asked and Jason reached for Dick's hand, pulling him forward so the slimmer man stood between his spread skull crushing thighs.

"I want you to eat my Doritos, Goldie." Jason whispered, gripping Dick's hand in both of his. Dick's eyes welled with tears. He had hoped to hear that for so long...it was like a dream come true.

"Red..." Dick breathed. "Of course." He pulled the man up for a kiss. The two continued to heavily make out for a long moment while Slade politely waited. Finally they pulled apart and Dick motioned to Deathstroke.

"I'm still working. We can meet up later?" He asked, hopefully and Jason nodded, kissing Dick's cheek.

"Yeah, you finish up here. I'll be waiting for you...at home." He retrieved his helmet and flipped Slade off as he leaped out the window, Dick staring after him with a little smile on his lips.

"I didn't know you liked rimming, kid." Deathstroke spoke up again. Nightwing finally turned to face his nemesis.

"Well it's really not something that comes up in polite conversation." He pointed out and Deathstroke sighed.

"Kid, I've had you in some really impolite positions. I don't think that matters between us." The mercenary sounded amused and Dick smiled slightly.

"I guess not." He conceded. "I guess you were too vanilla for me." He sighed, looking away. Slade stared.

"I tied you to the ceiling." Deathstroke replied, pride wounded and Dick nodded.

"That was actually sort of fun. A bit weird for a training exercise, but fun." He admitted, pulling Slade to his feet to continue with is arrest.

"I think he'll be good for you." Slade Wilson admitted. "Fights with you are more interesting after you've been laid."

And wasn't that the truth?


End file.
